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A Whale's Tale

by Ambergris

supported by
Lew Dewalt
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1.
Zawodny's Law 01:17
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DON’T FUCK WITH SIMPLE!
2.
All U Can Eat 02:21
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Don’t need a plate, you can skip the fork Just give me a shovel and three pounds of pork I don’t wanna get no grief Just mashed potatoes and a side of beef ALL YOU CAN EAT! ALL YOU CAN EAT! I can’t even see my feet ALL YOU CAN EAT! ALL YOU CAN EAT! The price of this food just can’t be beat Don’t bother me, I’m not on a break Just trying to get through this Salisbury Steak And stay away from me with that healthy apple I’d rather drown myself in this trough of scrapple I don’t care if it’s turning green As long as it glistens with an oily sheen PORK PIE PUDDING KRAUT WATERMELON STEW I ate so much I’m gonna split in two The price of this shit just can’t be beat!
3.
The Well-Wisher 03:41
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Honesty has lost its luster Saying sorry won’t cut the muster This ain’t no playground game Being forced to take the blame for what you did And what you’re bound to do Saying sorry a thousand times Won’t get you what you left behind A job, a wife, or a better life You’ll never get it back again The things you had you never can Threw that away, and you said good day So now you got what you wanted And now you’re getting what you deserve You try to back step, cause you ain’t got the nerve To say you fucked up So I say good luck, good luck with all of that On your knees as you beg and plead Forgiveness for your dirty deeds They were done, dirt cheap So you can’t sleep And your soul is deep in debt With all the things you now regret The greed, the lust It’s all gone bust
4.
This Ends In A Hail Of Bullets 02:58
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Five in the evening another California night People headed home, putting work out of their sight But there’s trouble in the rearview and it’s moving really fast Looks like danger on the freeway will be on tonight’s newscast Now you’re running for your life Cause they’re coming for your life So you’re running, but you can’t win When they’re coming for your sins Crash and burn as choppers fly overhead Cars strewn on the interstate, let’s hope that no one’s dead All cause some maniac broke out from the law Got caught with a stash of heroin and decided to take off Who’s to say that you’ll ever get away From the drugs, guns, and violence that you live with everyday 90 behind the wheel, with the cops biting at your heels Doing 10 to 20 wasn’t part of this deal Leap from the wreckage, sprinting when you hit the ground Sweat in your face, your heart continues to pound You can run, you can jump, you can fight, you can hide But it ends in a hail of bullets and you’re on the losing side
5.
Undertow 04:34
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YO ! HO ! HO ! We’ve been out at sea It’s been 5 years, maybe more Just me and the boys, lookin’ for that whale It’s time for us to settle the score We work all day, from sun-up till it’s dark Riggin’ lines and hangin’ with the crew Drinkin’ rum and playing cards But the one thing that I don’t have is you Maybe tomorrow, we’ll go back home Maybe our journey will end Maybe tomorrow, we’ll turn around Maybe I’ll see you again It’s been 5 years since I saw you last The memories are all that remain Day after day on this wide open sea And I can’t wait to go back home Well we caught a lot of fish, and we saved a lot of ships We’ve been to every port and town But still no word since I saw you last This anchor is dragging me down It was 7 years ago, the night was dark and cold When the great whale destroyed our craft The USS Ambergris held fast through the night But in the end it was no match The ship fell apart, and the skipper lost his heart And shouted “every man for himself!” And we all swam to shore and watched an hour more As that beast took our boat down to hell
6.
No One Cares About You 02:50
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Well here she comes again That stuck up little bitch Acting like the cat’s meow But there’s one little hitch You think you can get any guy you want You think you can act Like a stuck up little cunt Well I’m fed up and I’m not afraid To say what I’m thinking anyway So listen up baby and try to see That I don’t care what you think of me cause No one… No one cares about you We all see right through your lies and bullshit what makes you think you can act like this? No one… No one cares about you Well no one’s being fooled by your evil ways And everyone’s sick and tired Of your prissy little face You think you can buy anything you want By flashing a smile and money But I’ve got to be blunt I’m sick and tired of watching you Walk around like you’re the queen of town So listen up honey you gotta see That I don’t care what you think of me Well maybe there will come a day When I’ll think of something better to say And maybe there will come a time When I’ll think of something better to rhyme But until that day you’ve gone too far And I’ll kick your ass out of my car
7.
When You Care Enough To Send Nothing At All 03:09
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Forget the roses, no fancy cards Not getting a nice dinner or candy hearts, no-oh No hundred dollar meal, won’t be no wine Cause I’m no friend of St. Valentine, no-oh No holidays for me this year No parties, for you my dear No diamonds, kisses, or cashmere this year Santa’s not coming down the chimney So there won’t be presents under the tree no-oh Holiday jewelers tell me what to buy But I tell them “fuck off and die”, yo-oh Why plan your birthday months ahead When it’s just another day that you’re not dead, no-oh Cake and balloons and silly hats No you’re not getting any of that, no-oh So not worth it
8.
One More Song 03:24
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I’m not here to preach ideals I don’t want to push my views Just want us to get together And share a tune or two Nobody’s pointing fingers And saying who’s to blame No need for glory seekers Or gunning for the fame One more for the broken heroes (we’ll sing along) One more for us worthless zeroes (we’ll sing along) Just one to sound the revelry Just a little dedication for you and me All we want is to stand as one Sing along and have some fun And I know we can’t go wrong With another nothing answer song Something for the young and old For the meek and for the bold A little ditty to fill the time For no reason and no rhyme And if we don’t seem to get a point across We won’t chalk it up as a failure or a loss If we do enough to really light up this place Mission accomplished if we put a smile on your face
9.
Life 04:17
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Have you ever looked around and suddenly found You were the old guy at the show? Everyone gives a stare, like you shouldn’t be there Like a circus freak sideshow Maybe you’re losing hair, but who are they to care This is where you’ll always want to be Cause there’ll come a time, when they’ll find That they’re just like you and me Kids of today, say I’m getting frayed Say I’m getting old and it’s time to go But I won’t sit back wasting my time away You gotta live each day to the fullest Cause it just might be your last Cherish all the good times Cause they go by way too fast Raise a glass to our good friends And the loved ones who have passed And live each day to the fullest Because it just might be your last Some will stay and others will go But for us, we’ll still be here Stay with our fiends, until the end And with that you can have no fear So who cares that they say, that you’re turning gray This is where you’ll always want to be Time’s too short to throw away what we call Our tight knit family
10.
Ignorance Is... 03:37
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Got a problem on planet Earth It’s falling apart and getting worse While terror wins, Bush just grins Seems like the world has gone perverse As we watch gas prices soar And everyone goes off to war Missiles fly, civilians die Pray it don’t reach our front door Back here in our hometown Everyday life’s been watered down By crappy bands and TV land Seems mind-fucked by a bunch of suited clowns It looks like everything has gone to hell But we just turn our heads and say oh well We’ll close our eyes and just go numb Live for today and pray tomorrow never comes Now rub the sleep dust from your sight See through the wrong and do what’s right Find the time to speak your mind Time for the blind to see the light So now will you have a heart And give the world a new kickstart? Will you give to let Earth live Or will you watch it fall apart?
11.
Get Off My Lawn You Goddamn Kids 01:14
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Every day when the sun comes out I get out of bed and I curse and shout Go outside and check my grass If I see you there, I’ll kick your ass Water, trim and fertilize Gotta keep it green or else it dies Poison all the rabbits and mice I don’t care if you don’t think I’m nice HEY! GET OFF MY LAWN! YOU GODDAMN KIDS! Well I’m too old to have any fun So I waste my time here in the sun I mow and I weed and I mow some more Won’t be done till my back is sore
12.
Die Skeletor, Die! 02:59
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Hey Ann, I saw you on the TV yesterday I couldn’t believe just how much nonsense you had to say Telling the nation about how heartbroke women felt Saying how they reveled in the cruel hand they were dealt You’re so smart and oh so brave But now you’ve got one in the grave And when you slip and take that fall I won’t be at your funeral Then I glance over at George Carlin sitting in the next seat Biting his lip at your unabashed conceit How Jay put up with the madness I will never know 5 seconds of that crap and I’d be kicking you out the door HELL NO, no one will go YOU’LL SEE, no friends will show Go ahead, be a know-it-all, but realize it’s your funeral Now you’ve got your book on the best seller’s list How can anyone read that shit without needing an exorcist? You want the world to know that you’re a mega hit But when I look at you I see fifty pounds of shit DIE SKELETOR, DIE! Fuck you, Ann Coulter
13.
K.O.T.L.V. 01:41
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LONG LIVE THE KINGS!
14.
The Fox 02:10
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I ain’t lookin’ for love I ain’t lookin’ for a beauty queen I ain’t lookin’ to settle down Baby, you got what I need So hot in that little skirt High-heeled shoes, you’re such a flirt Survey says you’re number 1 In my book so let’s have some fun Don’t matter if you’re good or bad Don’t really care if your boyfriend’s mad I saw you over there lookin’ my way Listen up honey I just gotta say See I don’t care if you never call It wouldn’t bother me, no not at all You’re the best that I never had I’m a fox and I need it bad THE FOX IS ON YOUR TRAIL THE FOX IS CHASING TAIL!
15.
Raid The Vault 03:56
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I’m so bored, don’t know what to do Just sit around here just thinking of you Anxiety’s got a hold of me There’s nothing inside that I can see Things aren’t always what they seem And you can’t always find your dream Speaking of dreams I gotta say Didn’t we write this yesterday? When you’ve bled the well dry tell me What the hell we supposed to do? Go back to 2002! Raid, raid the vault Play all the songs you wanna hear Raid, raid the vault Same old shit we did last year Raid, raid the vault Play all the songs you’ve heard before Raid, raid the vault One more tune then we’re out the door Always forcing your views on me, but I don’t care what you believe The falling snow, my failing mind, I keep running but I’m left behind Now we’ve gone our separate ways, our sun has turned to a haze Wait a minute, hold the phone… we did that fifteen years ago! Cause when writer’s block is just about to drive you mad… Hey, “Dinner Music” wasn’t so bad. I can’t come up with one original note… Let’s play something that Puppet wrote!

about

A Whale’s Tale was Ambergris’ second full-length CD released on June 13, 2009. It represents the culmination of three long years of writing new material. The songwriting has improved and some of the bands best efforts are showcased on this disc. Despite the quality of the songs, overall dissatisfaction with the mix led to a short lifespan and to several of the tracks being re-recorded on 2010’s “This Blows” EP.

credits

released June 13, 2009

– Truman: Vocals
– Art: Guitar, Backing Vocals
– G: Guitar, Backing Vocals
– Will: Bass, Backing Vocals
– Steve: Drums, Backing Vocals
– Gail From New York: Backing Vocals on No One Cares About You

All music by Ambergris

Recorded July, 2008 at Ballzdeep Studio in Hackettstown, NJ. Recorded and engineered by Dean Sanginari. Mixed and Mastered by Ambergris March – April, 2009.

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Ambergris Whitehall, Pennsylvania

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